- Death of a Salesman

The rumors flew across the internet and throughout Miami last night that the wicked witch was finally dead. While we chilled our champagne and prepared to light our cigars, the news never did materialize and we awoke this morning to another day with the tyrant that has held the island of Cuba in a merciless chokehold still in our midst. Although it is quite possible that castro is already enjoying his eternal damnation in hell and suffering a torment greater than even the most imaginative among us could conceive of, we cannot celebrate until the news is official.

We have been fooled in the past by rumors and unofficial news reports touting the demise of the dictator. Whether these reports were planted or the result of a wishful thought gone out of control, the initial elation we all felt soon gave way to a deeper feeling of despair when we realized the reports were false. We are all better off being as patient as we can—not even the wicked one can avoid death.

The Cuban government, in my opinion, will be very careful releasing the eventual news of the tyrant’s death and I have no reason to believe they will do it a minute sooner than they have to. Every detail of the announcement and how it will be released was most likely scripted months, if not years ago, and it will be given first to news organizations that are sympathetic and are willing to play ball with the regime. In death, just as in his life, castro will sell himself as the selfless leader that saved his nation from US imperialism and stood up against the monolithic oppressor to his north. The Cubans who have suffered know better, but he never really cared what Cubans thought of him anyway.

Throughout his entire life, including childhood, castro has sold himself as something he is not. His life is a culmination of lie after lie in an attempt to sell the world a non-existent bill of goods. Why should his death be any different?

Prepare yourselves, my friends, for a well-designed multi-media extravaganza touting the death of one of the most prolific salesmen of our times. The fact that he sold only death and destruction will be mysteriously missing from the eulogies, but those of us who know are only interested in the part that says he is dead!